irreversible

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i have escaped winter to return to the tropics and my sweat pores are ecstatic upon receiving the green light to perform to their full potential.

mmm nothing much has changed, at least not the bits that matter.
its strange how being away for so long (2 yrs) automatically makes one assume that some monumental breakthrough must have taken place.

not there havent been some improvements here and there.
the mrt now shows which side the doors open; fashion now includes more than just a variety of tshirts shorts and slippers. and theres a significant loss of public space now that orchard has undergone a major revamp and more shopping mall clones have sprouted and also all those other touristy attractions in the south. uhh not exactly an improvement as far as im concerned.

unsettled by the stillness of the countryside, i could never stay away from the city for long. ive always had a fondness for colourful neon lights, drawn to them like the proverbial moth to a flame. i secretly lamented about growing up in a city which cheated me out of experiencing the vibrancy and energy that came with gaudy billboards and neon signs. but now i fear that with the rush singapore is pushing progress in so little time and so much less space, we might just lose ourselves in the process. (that will be another topic involving prolonged discussion, stay tuned.)

on another note, it floors me why some people get offended when i joke about needing a tour guide when i come home. i dont intentionally act like a foreigner in my own country. (for the record, i also dont intentionally act or dress like a japanese, or singaporean or anyone in particular.) but for the most part im beginning to enjoy and look forward to these regular, albeit brief trips home. coming back from a foreign land with fresh eyes that dont exactly look at things with the same perspective as before is such a treat because you suddenly see the beauty in your hometown you had once taken for granted.

1. singapore should learn from japan the way to wait outside elevators, train doors, bus doors and the like
2. japan should learn from singapore how to maintain a perfectly smoke free environment

i have no clear recollection of anything that happened before my life in japan. it is as if i only began to live the moment i left my hometown. as if what happened had been too frightening and i had wished those memories away. but i know they used to be there, collecting in the space between my ears, because they surface now and then again when i least expect it and this is the time now to record each individual fragment before age strips me of my cognitive abilities.

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dropped by the bookstore today to pick out something for a friend’s birthday gift, and somehow ended up spending more time among the shelves than originally expected (read: until store closing) hello, self-control?


some interesting reads i spotted:

screenplay of the Mummy which comes with japanese translations, meant for english learners.

having the book would really come in handy in situations such as:
- when you want to make an excuse to leave early, you say “This place… is cursed.”
- when describing someone who has just gotten botox, you say, “He’s fully rejuvenated.”
- when expressing gratitude on behalf of a transplant recipient, you say “[He] thanks you for your hospitality. And for your eyes, and for your tongue.”
mmm nifty.



singapore recipe book – co-written by a group of japanese, endorsed by a french
authenticity is obvious from what is written in the preface “hainanese chicken rice, national dish of singapore originates in hainan, china…”


what really alarmed me was the extent Twilight merchandise dominated the shelves.
(picture coming soon)
we can now safely deduce the sanity level of girls in japan.
im just really appreciative of the fact that noone in my social circle has tried to preach Twilight to me.

if you’ve dropped by to read something cheery and heartwarming, sorry but im going to disappoint. discontent has always been a far more effective source of literary inspiration for me than happiness. but thats also because ive got a whole lot more of the former going for me than the latter.
i’ve been trying hard to replace that hard bitter cynic in me with something a bit… more positive less depressing. believe me i really am trying. hell, i make it my new year resolution every year to stay positive and tone down on that self-doubt. speaking of which. frightful yes, but 2009 is verily coming to an end in 12 days. so i guess, maybe not this year then. maybe… next year.


these days i find it almost impossible to extricate self from the covers.
tis the season, i tell myself. and the wonky radiator that churns out heat disproportionate to the electricity bill definitely isnt helping. but hey, i cant exactly see myself as the sort to bound excitedly out of bed, pull back the curtains, open the windows, and let the sun shine in! fa la la! anyhow im practising drinking a glass of red wine daily to keep the extremities from turning into popsicles. i hope that one day i’ll be able to actually swallow without wincing (like a true adult), and henceforth sweet oblivion, i shall embrace thee with open arms.


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i met quite a handful of abcs who were born in usa but had parents originally from china, or had moved from china when they were very young. they asked if i could speak chinese, and to my surprise, confessed that they couldnt. even those few who could, didnt know how to read or write the language.

i wonder which is worse- not being able to converse with most of the world in English, or not knowing your own mother tongue and consequently, your own heritage and cultural roots. its equally sad, to learn that those parents didnt make enough effort to ensure that their children retain ties to their heritage.

sometimes when i look back, i realise that this is something i can never thank singapore enough for.

but clearly, our juggling of multiple languages has given us an accent which might be deemed incomprehensible to some at times. which is why ive been motivated to master multiple accents, not because im ashamed of my current style of speech, but because i want to excel at switching from one to another and prove those who discriminate against foreign accents wrong.

it also makes me want to hurl something heavy and life-threatening whenever someone makes the comment “oh you sound so bizarre! is it because you have an accent?” well, so do YOU, dimwit.


/linguistics 101/
1. everyone speaks with an accent. (yes, what most of you americans have is an AMERICAN accent.)
2. theres no such thing as a correct accent. or a wrong one. or neutral. or superior or inferior. accents might be associated with higher prestige but those associations are societal and cultural constructs, and therefore, should be .
3. technically noone speaks the Standard accent, because we all have idiosyncrasies in our idiolects, even if they are very very inconspicuous ones.